A Letter That Will Never Be Read

At least by my mother...

Dear Mom,


I realize that me springing my choice of lifestyle was a bad idea on my part, at least in the timing sense of the events. But I am still me, despite my choice of lifestyle.  I want to tell you that some aspects that you think of this life is greatly disproportionate to the way things really are.  I want to tell you that I am still Rose, that I am in comepleate control of how i live in this life, that i still have free will. 


I want to tell you that there are proceedures and ways things are done to make sure that no real bodily harm comes to any parties involved, that nothing of what i get is something i dont want.  I know you dont want to know the specifics, but i can answer you truthfully and to the best of my ability of any question that you present to me from my own personal experience.


I do have my limits, and any respectable person in this life abides by the phrase "Safe, Sane, Consentual". There are negotiations, understandings, processes for everything that you can think of.  "Submissive" and "slave" and NOT interchangeable, there are distinct differences between them.


There is so much I want to tell you, about the life, about Scott, about this life i want to lead.  But i cannot tell you, because you refuse to listen, to ask whatever questions i know you want to ask. I cant even talk to you about parties, because you think the worst.  It is just like any other club, smoke, lights, loud music, people scantily clad, there are just a few more interesting details that are left out at any other "normal" club.


I never touch an alcoholic drink when i am there, i keep my water covered when i'm not drinking from it. I take the normal safety precautions, just like i would at any club.


But your definition of normal used to be mine, now it has changed, and all for the better.  I feel so content where im at.. i feel like i belong when i am with my friends that i have made in the community, and i know that there are more friends to be made out there.


The books are references and guides, to better educate and teach me proceedure and the general rules for each scene. And its not always about sex, not always about the physical connection.  I dont sleep around, never have, never will.  I know you and i have vastly different experiences with sex and sexuality, but I can assure you, i have and i never will sleep with just anyone.


I have the freedom to choose, and choose i will.  I am not a whore, or a slut, at least in the degrading sense of the word.  But i am proud of my sexuality, and do not and will not feel/find any shame in it.  I will share my experiences with those that want to know, that are curious, but i will never preach or force this life on anyone.


There is so much more that needs to be said,


But i love you so much, and i hope one day you can accept who i have become.


Love you,


Rose