*Cross Posted to my Blog On FETLIFE*
okay... so... yeah... *~scratches head meekly~*
My ex- BF is going to be in town to watch his aunts dogs while she is out of the country for two weeks. . . doesn't sound so stressful right? We've met twice for lunch now (today being the second time) and its been good, i haven't feel any pain or heartache. . . so why am i stressed right?
Well. . . i still want to fuck him. . . I still want to let loose on him, over him, under him. The craving for his flesh, his taste, and the sound of his voice is still there, hiding under the surface. The craving isn't as strong as it was shortly after we broke up. . . but i still want him.
I still want to hear his growling voice calling me a dirty slut, a nasty whore; still want to hear his groans as i suck on his cock or bite/scratch him in all the right places. I still want his strong hands gripping my hips and spanking my ass, I still want to watch his face contort and feel his body lose control as he comes, his thick cock filling and stretching me as i like.
He may not be as long as my previous Master and my FWB, but damn could he fill me up.
I'm scared/stressed because part of me will always love him, will always wonder "what if"...and i know i wont be able to withstand that type of heartbreak again even with my meds...
Advice?
There's nothing wrong with wanting to fuck him. However you just have to tell yourself that's all it is. Just some hot sex than move on.
ReplyDelete~Jessica~