It's been a while

I've moved to Tumblr for the most part, seeing as how its a little easier to use/find "blogs" to follow, and to post in and of itself.  Sure you cant have the fancy text and shit but whatever. I can still post photos and videos and gifs and the like so its all good..  Can't be as kink as i get on here so i MIGHT just keep this one running for a bit.


Just as a general update:


Riven and I finally have moved into our own place.  A nice comfy one one in the same community I've been living in, which makes things easier (rent includes TV and intrawebs... it's Direct Plus, but its something). Its tight paying rent month to month, however we're making it... barely... Once Riven gets a job, things should be a bit easier.


I had a sub for a few months but... it didn't really work out. He started becoming obsessed with me, and wanting me to be more that I was willing to give, especially considering that Riven and I have moved in together and are closing on our 1 year anniversary (Jan 16th).  Come to find out, he was planing on PROPOSING to me on the "anniversary" of him and I meeting, AT Faire, in front of other people (all while i'm still WITH Riven btw).


I told Riven, cuz well.. it's the smart thing to do.. he wasn't too happy about it.  He was as creeped out by it as i was if not more so.  


His recent actions and bi-polar downswings just pushed me away more, seeing as how my fears that his bi-polar would eventually have him acting like my father.  And in a way he did... suicide threats and other things.  Even if I was single... he's not the kind of person i'd be looking for in a mate.  And I thought that i had explained it to him clearly enough several times.  ~sigh~ well I've backed my happy butt away, and told him in no uncertain terms (as "mean" as i may have been to him - his words not mine) that i was not interested in having a romantic relationship with him and that I thought the dynamic that we had was only reinforcing his hopes and misconceptions.


Having my own stressors to deal with (my OWN recent bi-polar diagnosis, rent, trying to help riven find a job, other bills, work and family, building a stronger relationship/home with Riven), adding his ego to the insanity i'm juggling will only make things worse for me in the long run.


So I've removed him from my Fetlife dynamics listing and life at home is SOO much calmer now that i don't have him constantly texting me and interrupting what Riven and i are up to/watching/doing.